


Lost but Not Forgotten

by night9uake



Series: Ace!Nicky [2]
Category: The Old Guard (Comics), The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Ace!Nicky, Amnesia, Angst, Asexuality, But not really that much, Canon Gay Character, Canon Gay Relationship, M/M, Post-Canon, Temporary Amnesia, flowery writing, lot of moon and sun reference, no beta we die like men, or just space in general, two different versions
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 17:07:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26142328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/night9uake/pseuds/night9uake
Summary: A freak accident causes one of the immortals to lose some of their memories.“How can you not remember me? How can you not remember our 920 years of history? I’m the love of your life, our lives have been intertwined since the beginning…”Chapter one has the original work and then chapter two is a another version, where the one who got hurt is switched. Enjoy!
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova
Series: Ace!Nicky [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1900276
Comments: 6
Kudos: 86





	1. Lost but not forgotten

**Author's Note:**

> Trigger Warning for : Panic attack, anxiety and other themes.

Nicolo stared into his eyes, seeing nothing but pain, fear and pure hatred inside of them. The eyes of his loved one, filled to the brim with something he haven’t seen, in over a millennium. It sent shivers throughout the green eyed man’s body, feeling the dread inside of him starting to simmer. It his whole world collapsed right in front of him, there was no longer a moon to light up the night sky. No more a sun to send its glow across space to reflect on the moon.

“Joe, are you alright?” Nicolo’s voice trembled carefully when he asked. The Italian man reached out a hand, in instinct to comfort the brown eyed man. He immediately pulled it close to himself, when he saw how the hatred inside of those beautiful brown eyes grow by each second. Nicky’s whole world had crumble down to nothing. The love of a millennium they shared, was simply _gone_ … _He_ _knew_ instantly that this isn’t a break up, this was _something else_.

The fair haired man’s breath became more shallow, more unevenly. The world starts to spin around him. His eyes not focusing on the man before him, they weren’t focusing on anything all. Nicolo’s knees gave in, and he collapsed on the ground, feeling the cold stone floor against his knees. Crouching over and clutching his hair in-between his fingers, the rush of tears covering his sight. He could still feel the burn from the other man’s eyes on him. Joseph tried to burn a hole right through him, send Nicolo to the ninth circle of hell, alike he is a demon that doesn’t belong on this earth, and dimension.

“Nicky!” A concerned voice shouts, the green eyed man is not able to register who it belongs to. But the sharp pain spreading across his left cheek, shakes Nicolo back to reality. He blinked his eyes rapidly, and seeing Andy sitting hunched over in front of him, her eyes filled with worries like something he has never seen before.

“Joe, what’s going on? Why is Nicky having a panic attack? Why aren’t you comforting-” Nile queried, rubbing her eyes slightly, trying to rub off the sleepiness still filling them. Her face also heavy with concernment.

“ _Why_? Why would _I_ comfort _this bastard_?” Joe fumed, clenching his jaw while looking down on the Italian man sitting on the floor, who tried to control his breathing. “He _touched_ me!” The north African man added, standing up from the bed and walking over to the small kitchen with furious pace.

The three immortals shifted their glare over to Yusuf, following every step, breath he took. They saw how the dark haired man leaned over the kitchen sink and splashed his face with water, alike he was trying to cool off the anger boiling within every cell of him.

Andromache shifted her gaze back to Nicolo, she saw how his breathing where back to a normal pace.

“Want to tell me what _just happened_?” The older female asked, placing a comforting hand on the Italian man’s shoulder. His eyes glisten with the left over tears, but he swallowed the ever growing lump of tears in his throat.

“I- _I_ _touched_ his shoulder, when I walked past him…” Nicky’s voice broke and the tears started to well up inside of him, again. It broke both Nile’s and Andy’s heart to see him like this. Nicolo was the one supposed to be in control of his emotion, the person who would comfort everyone else before himself. He would tell Joe to relax and calm down, even when he felt the exact same anger and emotions inside of himself. “I knew something was _wrong_ , when I didn't feel his touch back,” a shuddering breath escaped his thin lips. “Then- _then_ I was met with a pair of eyes filled with _so much hatred_ … I haven’t seen that in his eyes since. _Since the crusades_.” Nicky’s green eyes met Andromache’s.

There were an abundance pain inside of his eyes, that _even_ _she_ was stunned with the lack of words to say. Nicolo moved himself up from the floor, brushing off the dust that had gathered on his pants. “I need some fresh air,” the Italian man mumbled while he walked out of the bedroom. Nicky felt the burning gaze of Yusuf once again, burn into his back. He sensed the difference between the desire and lust his loved one would usually portray, and this wasn’t it. This was _pure breed_ resentment, _hatred_.

The cold air was another sharp pain spreading inside of his lungs. The temperature made his skin shiver for a different reason. It where almost grounding to feel, hear the snow under his feet. The fair haired man over looked the view from the balcony. Seeing the snow covered mountains, how the small village was covered in a blanket of snow. Making it seem like it could been a duvet cover, with how all the sounds seemed to be lost and non existing. His own breath being the only sound heard across the street. Not even another soul is out here in the dead of night and in the cold.

“Not thinking about taking a leap?” Nile questioned, her voice was in a soft tone but enough for the fair haired man to be brought back from his drifting thoughts. Nicky turn around as the sound of the door closed shut behind him. His eyes slightly meeting the younger female’s.

“No... _not ever_.” He mumbled back, brushing away the tears still in his eyes. The redness on his cheek, the red blown eyes already gone, healed _as if_ they hadn’t been there from the beginning. But not the emotional pain, it hurt extremely horrendous inside of his heart. Nicolo wished with all his might for this to _only_ be a sick joke from Joseph.

“I made tea, if you want some?” Nile tried to smile, but it was difficult, it was painful for her. To see her friends, no her _family_ being in tatters and not being able to fix it. Nicolo only nodded and followed her inside, feeling how his body embraced the heat off the apartment and taking a seat at the kitchen table. But he didn’t reach for the cup placed in front of him, nor did his eyes lift up to see who joined him.

“It seems as if Joe here, has lost some memories…” Andy spoke softly. All four of them had been sitting around the table in silence, neither of them drinking the tea. The immortals didn’t dare to break this ever pressing feeling of uneasiness. Nicky felt how Andromache glared directly at him, waiting for him to lift his eyes up, to either meet hers or _his_. But Nicolo couldn’t, the green eyed man didn’t have _the strength_ inside of him to meet anyones glare, to feel how his heart, his _soul_ shatter by each gaze from someone else then _him_.

“ _Only some_?” A quiet whisper left the Italian man’s lips, there couldn’t be _some_ memories gone. If the love of his life suddenly looked at him with a pair of eyes filled to the brim with antagonism. That was over 900 years of history, of _feelings_ flushed straight down the drain.

“Yes, _some_.” Yusuf interjected, his voice was harsh. Not the warmth that would speak of _their love,_ how it could move the stars, how their passion still was very much alive after a millennium. There was only coldness inside of him. It made green eyed man shiver more than the frosty night had. “I remember my _first_ death, how I meet Andromache and Nile. What missions we have done, but I do not remember _you_.” He continued, the shuddered traveled further along the spine of the fair haired man.

“How can you not remember _me_? How can you not remember our _920 years of history_? _I’m the love of your life_ , our lives have been intertwined since _the beginning_ …” Nicky spoke in a quavering voice, finally lifting his gaze up, he locked eye contact directly with Joe.

“How could I ever love _a man like you_? You and your people _invaded_ my country, _captured_ my city.” The tone in Joseph’s voice rose, he leaned forward, pressing both of his hands into the table. The dark haired man even stood up to get more authority over Nicky, glaring all the hatred he could muster up into the eyes of Nicolo. The Italian man didn’t flinch.

“ _I don’t know…_ I don’t know how we traded our hatred for each other to the amorousness we have- _had_ ,” Nicky explained, shifting his eyes back down to the cup in front of him. His fingers lighting touching it, feeling the warmth radiating from the cup into his hands.

“I would never in a million years look at you in _that way_ , you _devil_.” Yusuf fumed, the chair made a scraping noise when he pushed it backwards and rushed into the bedroom. The dark haired man shocked the rest of the immortals with the harsh bang and leaving them to sit in uncomfortableness of the conversation.

“ _Nicky…_ ” Nile started to speak but she didn’t know what to say when the Italian man meet her eyes. The tears had started to form again inside of his eyes but he couldn’t let them fall, not again.

“It’s okey… _It will be okey_.” Nicolo breathed, leaving Andy and Nile alone in the kitchen. Walking over to the sofa and laying down, not bothering with grabbing a blanket to cover himself with.

Joseph heard a soft knock on the door, he looked up from where he had been sitting on the bed. Nile peaked inside and saw that he was awake. The younger female closed the door behind her as quietly as she could, before taking a seat on the bed, right next to the north African man.

“How are you feeling?” She inquired, her tone of voice was kind but her eyes did portray something elseother than friendliness, it was pain.

“You are asking me? And not _him_?!” Joe muttered, the dark haired man looked a bit shocked but still he appreciated the kindness.

“Yes, you are two people. You both lost something-you might not remember it, or even feel it, right now.” The younger female mentioned, Nile could instantly see how Yusuf was squirming in his seat. He seemed uncomfortable with the thought of being close with someone one, like Nicky. “ _You_ _lost him too_ … _”_ The younger female mumbled, leaving the north African man all alone with his thoughts.

*

Nicolo was sitting in the sofa, reading a book. It had been weeks since Joe lost his memories. He was still hostile towards the fair haired man but it was getting better. They had managed to have conversations when either Nile or Andy was close by, and _almost_ conversation when it was the two of them. It had taken a lot of strength from the green eyed man not to go back to the old habits that had developed during their millennium together.

The fair haired man had to admit that it felt strange, to not feeling the pair of strong arms around his waist as he slept. To not feel the warmth only those arms could bring, the affection that he had grown accustomed too. The Italian man knew definitely that they weren’t on friendly terms because he could see how the north African man was planning something in his head, how to slice Nicky’s throat while he slept or how to poison his food. Though Nicolo was glad or at least appreciated that Yusuf hadn’t acted on those thoughts, and clearly Andromache and Nile felt the same. At least they where comfortable enough with leaving them alone together, and knowing that they wouldn’t find a corpse on the ground when they got back. The females had decided to take some minor missions on the side for themselves, saying that the two men could use some ‘bonding time’, when they really felt like they didn’t work good enough as a group together. The thought about Joe killing him, again, was obviously a clear reminder of what the fair haired man had lost. It sent him into a spiraling path of thoughts that ended up with him feeling very much alone. Nicolo could relate more than ever with Booker, how the french man must have felt when everyone he loved had died. But Joseph wasn’t dead, he wasn’t _there_ anymore. Well, not the same Joe that would shout out to the world about how much he loved Nicolo, how he would speak about their love being brighter than the stars during the night. That man was gone, at least what the group theorized.

A loud clattering noise broke the fair haired man’s focus, bringing him out of his deep thoughts and back to the sofa where he was sitting with a closed book in his lap. The green eyed man swiftly moved his gaze up to where the noise had come from. Nicolo saw Joe’s shadow move around behind the door, through the small frosted glass window.

“Everything alright?” Nicky questioned, but when he didn’t get answer from Yusuf, he quickly walked over to the door. Feeling the wave of anxiety starting to flow inside of him, alike the uneasy waves of the ocean. Waiting to crash against his chest and shatter every part of his being into nothing more than some speckles of dirt. _As if_ he had never existed before.

Nicolo knocked on the door carefully, waiting for an answer before opening it a smidge. The fair haired man saw the other man sitting on the bed with his hands in his lap, holding a leather bound book in-between them. The Italian man knew instantly which book it was, he saw by the wear and tear that it was one of Joe’s many sketchbooks.

“The figurine went in the floor... While I was reaching for _this_ ,” Yusuf mumbled, holding up the book to show Nicky. The Italian man peaked his head more inside to see which exact figurine smashed on the floor. Luckily it wasn’t one of Andy’s, only some random decorative thing sitting on the shelf.

“That’s okey, I will get a broom.” Nicky spoke in a soft tone, he was already halfway out of the doorway to grab it.

“I guess you didn’t lie about our relationship...” He heard Joe whisper, making the green eyed turn around halfway to look at him. Their eyes meeting for a quick second, the longest either of them had looked at each other, for weeks.

“I would never _lie_ about our past,” Nicolo answered. “But I guess you wouldn’t really _know that..._ ” he added, shifting his gaze down to his shoes, seeing the small bits and pieces of the figuring being dusted across the floor, like a moonless night with only the stars as comfort.

“I have some vague memories of sketching, some of them…” Joe mumbled,“I can’t remember exactly _why_ I drew them, or _whom_ they are supposed to be. But I do remember _the feeling_ I felt while drawing, the warm, safe… I guess one simple word for it would be _love_ , but it doesn’t feel like that word gives it the right feeling. Actually it feels like there is no word to describe exactly what _I felt_ when sketching them.” The brown eyed man whispered, his eyes almost filled with tears. Joe’s eyes didn’t hold the glaring hate inside of them when he gazed at Nicky, once again. The men felt a connection, there was finally some puzzle pieces matching somewhere in the puzzle. Nicky gave a somber smile, he blinked a bit to try and disperse the tears forming inside of them. The Italian man was both relived and not at all, to hear Joe whisper words about _love_ , how it’s _not enough_ to describe what they had together.

“You- _You_ would often sketch on your free time,” A lump of tears was starting to grow inside his throat. “Gosh, I have no idea how many sketch books you have had during our time together... You wouldn’t only draw my face, sometimes scenery that you saw during our travels,“ Nicky chuckled, pushing his hair backwards as he thought of the fond memories.

“I see that, though I suppose that theses are _you_ as well?” Joe asked, holding up the sketch book and showing one of them for the Italian man. Nicky chuckled again, his cheeks got covered in a light pink shade, spreading all the way up to his ears.

“Yeah, that’s me. I’m surprised you still sketched, _that part of me,_ ” the green eyed man scratched the back of his neck. “I should go and get the broom,” he cleared his throat before quickly turning on his heel.

“Nic-“ Joseph hesitated, but he tried to take back what ever he was gonna say when the fair haired man looked back. Their eyes meeting, the connection between them felt like sparks of electricity spreading across their bodies.

*

The dark haired man woke with a panting breath, feeling the pulse of his heart beat hard inside of his chest. The vivid dream—no, the memories of seeing a beautiful smile form on Nicky’s lips. Joe hadn’t seen anything like that before, it was as if he saw the bright moon light up the whole night sky, _if_ it could smile. Joseph hadn’t seen Nicky smile like that at all during these weeks, the only thing that was close to it, was when the Italian man had chuckled about the sketchbooks, but _that smile_ was filled pain. And this wasn’t. It was filled with so much happiness, love and everything that could not be contained under the heavens.

The sensation of _his_ soft thin lips, pressed against Joe’s own. A smile forming on both of their faces as they felt the love, the warmth of each other. Joseph looked around in the dark bedroom, his fingers trembling against his bottom lip. Tracing where he had felt Nicolo’s lips, where they had touched. A trembling breath escaped his own, fear struck in the core of his soul. Not fear over that he had kissed another man, fear—terror over not remembering person that _he_ had loved with his whole soul, for _more than_ _900 years_. A person that had felt more like a part of himself, then anything else. A person who apparently no words could simply describe what they had felt for each other.

*

Nicky woke up with a gasping breath. His chest drenched in sweat, it felt as if he had taken his first breath of air after he had died. The fair haired man looked around himself, seeing the he was in the safe-house, the light inside of where Joseph was sleeping was still lit. He pushed his hair backwards, away from his face. Trying to breath deeply, calming his heart beat down and not feel the rush of adrenaline rush inside of him, after the nightmare.

The car crash was still vivid in his mind, Nicolo could feel the glass shatter across his skin, the feel of the wreckage slowly closing in on them. The metal bending, forming around their bodies. The look of terror from Joe’s eyes. The feeling and the sight of seeing how his deep brown eyes slowly became two dark beads as the life inside of him ran out. The hope that they would wake up again, the dread of either of them wouldn’t wake up. The only terror of the earth, that was the struck deep into their bones.

The taste of water, making its way inside of their lungs, burning pain as both of the men tried to take that first vital breath of air when they woke up from death. The heaviness of drenched clothes, sticking to both metal and human bodies. The sight of blood filled waters, clouding the water and their gazes. The sense of falling deeper, into a place where there might be no return from. Their life grazing across the event horizon. Seeing the fading light, fade into oblivion.

The desperate search of each other before both of them drowned, again. The fear striking again, as they had do it all over. Until they both where up on the shore, to feel that sweet taste of air, and not the water drowning their lungs, not the burning pain they felt when their lungs tried their best to convert the H2O to O2.

Nicolo felt the scratchy fabric from the sofa against his fingers, bring him back to reality, to where he was. The Italian man let out a deep sigh, before sitting up and hunching over. _“Could the car crash really have been the cause of Joe’s memory loss?”_ Nicky thought to himself. The green eyed man had never felt the urge to drown his thoughts in alcohol, he had seen Booker do that enough times. But right now, Nicky had never felt a stronger urge for a drink, he hoped that Andromache hadn’t drank all of it.

“Can’t sleep?” A dark whisper echoed across the kitchen table, sending a shiver across Nicky’s skin. He turned around and saw Joseph leaning against the door post, the dark haired man had his arms crossed over his chest. Joe’s eyes where filled with a kindness that Nicolo hadn’t seen in a long time, the urge—the crave for the drink increased.

“No,” the green eyed man answered, turning his focus back to the glass in front of him. “Had a nightmare-a memory of the last time you where _you_ …” Nicky breathed, the last words not more than a bare whisper before turning his gaze on Joseph. The way the moonlight shined in the room, made it almost seem like he had tears in his eyes. It made the Italian man almost drop his glass in the floor, but before they need to clean up the glass, Nicky sat it down on the counter behind him and walked up with a quick pace towards the other man.

The fair haired man almost touched Joseph’s cheek from habit, but he stopped himself and looked at brown eyed man. Joe nodded his head in a small, almost non existing action. But one Nicky _knew_ , he knew that Joe had given him consent to touch him. The Italian man’s hand where trembling as he moved it closer to the dark haired man’s cheek, feeling the scruff, and the warm sensation of his skin meeting his. Both of them let out a shaky breath, the waves of anxiety washing over them and letting them relax into this touch.

“I’m not who you think I am. I have _mostly_ no idea of these memories you speak of, these feelings of deep, emotional love. I’m not...” Yusuf’s voice broke up in the end, his eyes filled with tears. “I’m not whom I’m supposed to be,” he added, looking straight at the Italian man. Nicky’s eyes where filled with tears too, but they didn’t break their comfort from his eyes. Only building up, until one single tear rolled down the green eyed man’s cheek.

“Yes... I know that.” Nicolo whispered, shifting his eyes as he couldn’t longer bare to feel those brown eyes on him. The feeling of his loved one not being able to remember who they had been, what they had experienced _together_ as a couple during all those great years. To not be able to remember the first time they made each other laugh, cry or smile. Only able to remember the pain of each other swords puncturing into their soft flesh, the warm, thick, dark red blood trickling down and coating their hands and swords. Before the life ran out of them, then to have to do it all over again.

“Nic-I have seen these fragments of memories, of us… _Kissing_ ,” the brown eyed man whispered, his eyes shifting to the fair haired man who had moved his hand from Joe’s cheek down to his forearm. Drawing light circles with his index finger. “Have we… Ever?” Joe added with a stuttering breath, Nicolo quickly looked up at him. The Italian man knew instantly what this was about, and he could see on the flush color across Yusuf’s cheeks of what he didn’t really dare to ask him.

“No-well we tried once many centuries ago,” the green eyed man answered truthfully, making the north African man nod. “It’s not something for us.” Nicky added, his face almost completely expressionless. His finger had stopped moving, but it was still placed comfortably on top of Joe’s arm.

“But-” Joe looked even more confused, than he had when the Italian man had told him that they are—have been in love. The brown eyed man’s face showed a look of he trying really hard to wrap his mind around this. Nicky couldn’t help to chuckle a little. After all Joe looked pretty cute, when he was all confused like this and didn’t have a death glare pointed at Nicolo.

“Joseph, I’m asexual.” Nicky stated, a small, confident, smile forming on his lips. “I do not have sexual attraction and I don’t desire sex.” He explained, proud over who he is, but the green eyed man couldn’t help himself to pull away from Joe. Shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans instead, and taking a step backwards. Nicky’s body regaining its glisten in the moonlight, showering across his body from the window.

“Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t know,” Joe noted, moving closer to Nicky _as if_ the dark haired man was trying to regain the lost space between them.

“No worries, there is _noway that you couldn’t know_.” The Italian man smiled, and once again it where that somber one. The one that ached inside of Joseph, the heart wrenching pain filling him slowly. The one that made him want to embrace Nicolo in a big bear hug and not care about how he had _wanted_ to kill him weeks ago. “You should get some sleep,” Nicky mumbled before walking back to the counter and looking at the glass filled with alcohol.

“Will you be able too?” Joseph questioned, making the fair haired man turn his gaze back up. He didn’t answer, only giving the same somber smile, again. Joe tightened his fist behind his back, the north African man could feel how his body moved on his own towards the Italian man. Yusuf felt inside of him that he would cross the worlds ends, only to make that melancholy smile vanish from his, _beautiful_ , face.

Joseph placed his hands on either side of Nicky’s face and pulled him close, pushing his lips aggressively against the fair haired man’s. The glass breaking in the sink, as they melted into one. Their breathing became strained, the air heavy with passion, desire of each other. But Nicolo’s shoulder where trembling, his whole body was shaking. The dark haired man pulled their lips apart, he saw how the fair haired man was crying. The tears shining in the moonlight, like small stars cradling his face. The brown eyed man felt the panic rise inside of him. What had he done? Had he kissed him wrong or was there something else going on?

“Nic-” Joe’s voice trembled once more.

“I love you beyond measure and reason. You are the sun in my life, this guiding light that keeps me warm during the cold, dark, nights so I don’t have to shiver from the lack of your love. The warmth and kindness that fills your heart, is more than what world- _what I deserves_.” Nicky cried, “But I can’t kiss you, not now, when you don’t love me.” He added, pulling away from Joe’s embrace, leaving the dark haired man standing there all alone in the kitchen.

The cold air spreading inside of Nicolo’s lungs as he rushed outside on the balcony. The tear covered cheeks chilling by the low temperatures. The fair haired man saw the snow covered mountains, the blankets of snow. The quietness of the night filling him with peace.

*

The dark haired man felt the warmth from Nicky’s body slowly leaving him. His eyes completely empty, only two dark beads placed in his face. There was no more life inside of those light green eyes of his. Joseph’s hand trembled as he placed it lightly on the Italian man’s cheek, leaning forward and resting his forehead against the his. Joe’s whole body tenses, and the surge of memories flood back to him. He sees Nicolo smiling, it where like a sliver of moon light, peaking through and light up his entire world. Them sleeping together, arms wrapped around the fair haired man’s slender waist as the dark haired man tried to keep him safe from the dark and cold night. The centuries of them together, _in love_. Yusuf sees the bond he had never thought he would share with anyone, a _bond_ that he didn’t really think was possible, _to share_. They where _soulmates_.

Joe felt how all of his emotions boil inside of him. The anger, _the regret_ of what he had said to _the love of his life_ during these weeks, _months_.

“I remember… _Nicolo, I remember_.” He mumbles in Italian. The north African man felt a fear inside of him, _what if_ he wasn’t going to see that smile, to see Nicky’s beautiful eyes or to even say that he is sorry for all that he said. Joseph knows that he had caused Nicky a pain that he would never want to cause him.

“ _Nicolo_ … I am so sorry,” Joe sobs into his skin, lifting his gaze up and seeing that the fair haired man’s eyes is still lifeless—empty. The brown eyed man’s hands tremble down to the many bullet wounds covering Nicky’s body, the blood still seeping out, the wounds not healing. A shaky breath escaped Joe’s lips, the fear really struck deep inside of his bones. The dark haired man closed his eyes tight to let the burning of the tears disappear.

A gasp of air, his eyes looking around, trying to assert the situation. Nicolo saw Joe sitting bent over him, the brown eyed man’s hands trembling over his no longer existing wounds. His shoulder trembling and tears covering his cheeks, but his eyes closed tight as if Joe tried to hide himself from the pain of seeing the green eyed man’s dead—lifeless body.

“ _I’m here…_ ” Nicky whispers in Italian, moving his hands up towards Joseph’s cheek. The dark haired man open his eyes quickly and the deep brown meet the light green eyes. Like the forrest becoming one, _again_. Nicolo saw how tears form once again in Joe’s eyes, spilling over and covering his cheek’s, like speckles of sunlight. The fair haired man grunted in pain as he pulled the other man into an embrace, wrapping his arms tight around him and holding Yusuf close. Letting the dark haired man hear and feel his heart beat.

“I am so sorry, I have no words for how I acted towards you… _You are the love of my life, you are my everything, all and more_.” He cries into Nicky’s shoulder, the tears staining his clothes.

“ _Joseph…_ ”


	2. Memories Lost

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I changed so that it was Nicky who got hurt instead but the story is mostly the same. Just some words changed for it make a bit more sense of who is talking.
> 
> TW: Anxiety, Panic attack and other themes.

Joseph stared into his eyes, seeing nothing but pain, fear and pure hatred inside of them. The eyes of his loved one, filled to the brim with something he haven’t seen, in over a millennium. It sent shivers throughout the brown eyed man’s body, feeling the dread inside of him starting to simmer. It his whole world collapsed right in front of him, there was no longer a moon to light up the night sky.

“Nicky, are you alright?” Joe’s voice trembled carefully when he asked. The north African man reached out a hand, in instinct to comfort the green eyed man. He immediately pulled it close to himself, when he saw how the hatred inside of those beautiful green eyes grow by each second. Yusuf’s whole world had crumble down to nothing. The love of a millennium they shared, was simply _gone_ … _He_ _knew_ instantly that this isn’t a break up, this was _something else_.

The dark haired man’s breath became more shallow, more unevenly. The world starts to spin around him. His eyes not focusing on the man before him, they weren’t focusing on anything all. Joseph’s knees gave in, and he collapsed on the ground, feeling the cold stone floor against his knees. Crouching over and clutching his hair in-between his fingers, the rush of tears covering his sight. He could still feel the burn from the other man’s eyes on him. Nicolo tried to burn a hole right through him, send Joseph to the ninth circle of hell, alike he is a demon that doesn’t belong on this earth, and dimension.

“Joe!” A concerned voice shouts, the brown eyed man is not able to register who it belongs to. But the sharp pain spreading across his left cheek, shakes Yusuf back to reality. He blinked his eyes rapidly, and seeing Andy sitting hunched over in front of him, her eyes filled with worries like something he has never seen before.

“Nicky, what’s going on? Why is Joe having a panic attack? Why aren’t you comforting-” Nile queried, rubbing her eyes slightly, trying to rub off the sleepiness still filling them. Her face also heavy with concernment.

“ _Why_? Why would _I_ comfort _this bastard_?” Nicky fumed, clenching his jaw while looking down on the dark haired man sitting on the floor, who tried to control his breathing. “He _touched_ me!” The Italian man added, standing up from the bed and walking over to the small kitchen with furious pace.

The three immortals shifted their glare over to Nicolo, following every step, breath he took. They saw how the fair haired man leaned over the kitchen sink and splashed his face with water, alike he was trying to cool off the anger boiling within every cell of him.

Andromache shifted her gaze back to Joseph, she saw how his breathing where back to a normal pace.

“Want to tell me what _just happened_?” The older female asked, placing a comforting hand on the dark haired man’s shoulder. His eyes glisten with the left over tears, but he swallowed the ever growing lump of tears in his throat.

“I- _I_ _touched_ his shoulder, when I walked past him…” Joe’s voice broke and the tears started to well up inside of him, again. It broke both Nile’s and Andy’s heart to see him like this. “I knew something was _wrong_ , when I didn't feel his touch back,” a shuddering breath escaped his lips. “Then- _then_ I was met with a pair of eyes filled with _so much hatred_ … I haven’t seen that in his eyes since. _Since the crusades_.” Joe’s brown eyes met Andromache’s green.

There were an abundance pain inside of his eyes, that _even_ _she_ was stunned with the lack of words to say. Yusuf moved himself up from the floor, brushing off the dust that had gathered on his pants. “I need some fresh air,” the north African man mumbled while he walked out of the bedroom. Joe felt the burning gaze of Nicolo once again, burn into his back. He sensed the difference between the desire and lust his loved one would usually portray, and this wasn’t it. This was _pure breed_ resentment, _hatred_.

The cold air was another sharp pain spreading inside of his lungs. The temperature made his skin shiver for a different reason. It where almost grounding to feel, hear the snow under his feet. The dark haired man over looked the view from the balcony. Seeing the snow covered mountains, how the small village was covered in a blanket of snow. Making it seem like it could been a duvet cover, with how all the sounds seemed to be lost and non existing. His own breath being the only sound heard across the street. Not even another soul is out here in the dead of night and in the cold.

“Not thinking about taking a leap?” Nile questioned, her voice was in a soft tone but enough for the dark haired man to be brought back from his drifting thoughts. Joe turn around as the sound of the door closed shut behind him. His eyes slightly meeting the younger female’s.

“No... _not ever_.” He mumbled back, brushing away the tears still in his eyes. The redness on his cheek, the red blown eyes already gone, healed _as if_ they hadn’t been there from the beginning. But not the emotional pain, it hurt extremely horrendous inside of his heart. Yusuf wished with all his might for this to _only_ be a sick joke from Nicolo.

“I made tea, if you want some?” Nile tried to smile, but it was difficult, it was painful for her. To see her friends, no her _family_ being in tatters and not being able to fix it. Joseph only nodded and followed her inside, feeling how his body embraced the heat of the apartment and taking a seat at the kitchen table. But he didn’t reach for the cup placed in front of him, nor did his eyes lift up to see who joined him.

“It seems as if Nicky here, has lost some memories…” Andy spoke softly. All four of them had been sitting around the table in silence, neither of them drinking the tea. The immortals didn’t dare to break this ever pressing feeling of uneasiness. Joe felt how Andromache glared directly at him, waiting for him to lift his eyes up, to either meet hers or _his_. But Joseph couldn’t, the brown eyed man didn’t have _the strength_ inside of him to meet anyones glare, to feel how his heart, his _soul_ shatter by each gaze from someone else then _him_.

“ _Only some_?” A quiet whisper left his lips, there couldn’t be _some_ memories gone. If the love of his life suddenly looked at him with a pair of eyes filled to the brim with antagonism. That was over 900 years of history, of _feelings_ flushed straight down the drain.

“Yes, _some_.” Nicolo interjected, his voice was harsh. Not the warmth that filled his voice, with the enormous kindness that would speak of _their love_. How their passion still was very much alive after a millennium. There was only coldness inside of him, alike he was a cold-blooded killer. It made brown eyed man shiver more than the frosty night had. “I remember my _first_ death, how I meet Andromache and Nile. What missions we have done, but I do not remember _you_.” Nicky continued, the shuddered traveled further along the spine of the dark haired man.

“How can you not remember _me_? How can you not remember our _920 years of history_? _I’m the love of your life_ , our lives have been intertwined since _the beginning_ …” Joe spoke in a quavering voice, finally lifting his gaze up, he locked eye contact directly with Nicky.

“How could I ever love _a man like you_? You and your people _invaded_ the holy land.” The tone in Nicolo’s voice rose, he leaned forward and pressing both of his hands into the table. The fair haired man even stood up to get more authority over Joe, glaring all the hatred he could muster up into the eyes of Joseph. The dark haired man didn’t flinch.

“ _I don’t know…_ I don’t know how we traded our hatred for each other to the amorousness we have- _had_ ,” Joe explained, shifting his eyes back down to the cup in front of him. His fingers lighting touching it, feeling the warmth radiating from the cup into his hands.

“I would never in a million years look at you in _that way_ , you _devil_.” Nicolo fumed, the chair made a scraping noise when he pushed it backwards and rushed into the bedroom. The fair haired man shocked the rest of the immortals with the harsh bang and leaving them to sit in uncomfortableness of the conversation.

“ _Joe…_ ” Nile started to speak but she didn’t know what to say when he meet her eyes. The tears had started to form again inside of his eyes but he couldn’t let them fall, not again.

“It’s okey… _It will be okey_.” Joseph breathed, leaving Andy and Nile alone in the kitchen. Walking over to the sofa and laying down, not bothering with grabbing a blanket to cover himself with.

Nicolo heard a soft knock on the door, he looked up from where he had been sitting on the bed. Nile peaked inside and saw that he was awake. The younger female closed the door behind her as quietly as she could, before taking a seat on the bed, right next to the Italian man.

“How are you feeling?” She inquired, her tone of voice was kind but her eyes did portray something elseother than friendliness, it was pain.

“You are asking me? And not _him_?!” Nicky muttered, the fair haired man looked a bit shocked but still he appreciated the kindness.

“Yes, you are two people. You both lost something-you might not remember it, or even feel it, right now.” The younger female mentioned, Nile could instantly see how Nicolo was squirming in his seat. He seemed uncomfortable with the thought of being close with someone one, like Joe. “ _You_ _lost him too_ … _”_ The younger female mumbled, leaving the Italian man all alone with his thoughts.

*

Yusuf was sitting in the sofa, sketching on a piece of paper. It had been weeks since Nicky lost his memories. He was still hostile towards the dark haired man but it was getting better. They had managed to have conversations when either Nile or Andy was close by, and _almost_ conversation when it was the two of them. It had taken a lot of strength from the brown eyed man not to go back to the old habits that had developed during their millennium together.

The dark haired man had to admit that it felt strange, to not feeling the slender waist under his arms as he slept. To not feel the warmth only _his_ body could bring, the affection that he had grown accustomed too. The north African man knew definitely that they weren’t on friendly terms because he could see how the Italian man was planning something in his head, how to slice Joe’s throat while he slept or how to poison his food. Though Joseph was glad or at least appreciated that Nicolo hadn’t acted on those thoughts, and clearly Andromache and Nile felt the same. At least they where comfortable enough with leaving them alone together, and knowing that they wouldn’t find a corpse on the ground when they got back. The females had decided to take some minor missions on the side for themselves, saying that the two men could use some ‘bonding time’, when they really felt like they didn’t work good enough as a group together. The thought about Nicky killing him, again, was obviously a clear reminder of what the dark haired man had lost. It sent him into a spiraling path of thoughts that ended up with him feeling very much alone. Yusuf could relate more than ever with Booker, how the french man must have felt when everyone he loved had died. But Nicolo wasn’t dead, he wasn’t _there_ anymore. Well, not the same Nicky that would shout out to the world about how much he loved Joseph, how he would speak about their love being brighter than the stars during the night. That man was gone, at least what the group theorized.

A loud clattering noise broke the dark haired man’s focus, bringing him out of his deep thoughts and back to the sofa where he was sitting with a sketch in his lap. The brown eyed man swiftly moved his gaze up to where the noise had come from. Yusuf saw Nicky’s shadow move around behind the door, through the small frosted glass window.

“Everything alright?” Joe questioned, but when he didn’t get answer from Nicolo, he quickly walked over to the door. Feeling the wave of anxiety starting to flow inside of him, alike the uneasy waves of the ocean. Waiting to crash against his chest and shatter every part of his being into nothing more than some speckles of dirt. _As if_ he had never existed before.

Joseph knocked on the door carefully, waiting for an answer before opening it a smidge. The dark haired man saw the other man sitting on the bed with his hands in his lap, holding a leather bound book in-between them. Joe knew instantly which book it was, he saw by the wear and tear that it was one of his many sketchbooks.

“The figurine went in the floor... While I was reaching for _this_ ,” Nicolo mumbled, holding up the book to show Joe. The brown eyed man peaked his head more inside to see which exact figurine smashed on the floor. Luckily it wasn’t one of Andy’s, only some random decorative thing sitting on the shelf.

“That’s okey, I will get a broom.” Joe spoke in a soft tone, he was already halfway out of the doorway to grab it.

“I guess you didn’t lie about our relationship...” He heard Nicky whisper, making the brown eyed man turn around halfway to look at him. Their eyes meeting for a quick second, the longest either of them had looked at each other, for weeks.

“I would never _lie_ about our past,” Yusuf answered. “But I guess you wouldn’t really _know that..._ ” he added, shifting his gaze down to his shoes, seeing the small bits and pieces of the figuring being dusted across the floor, like a moonless night with only the stars as comfort.

“I have some vague memories of them…” Nicky mumbled,“I can’t remember exactly _why_ I looked at them, or _whom_ they are supposed to be. But I do remember _the feeling_ I felt when I saw them for the first time, the warm, safe… I guess one simple word for it would be _love_ , but it doesn’t feel like that word gives it the right feeling. Actually it feels like there is no word to describe exactly what _I felt_ when seeing them.” The green eyed man whispered, his eyes almost filled with tears. Nicky’s eyes didn’t hold the glaring hate inside of them when he gazed at Joe, once again. The men felt a connection, there was finally some puzzle pieces matching somewhere in the puzzle. Joe gave a somber smile, he blinked a bit to try and disperse the tears forming inside of them. The north African man was both relived and not at all, to hear Nicky whisper profound words about _love_ , how it’s _not enough_ to describe what they had together.

“You- _You_ would often watch me sketch on your free time,” A lump of tears was starting to grow inside his throat. “Gosh, I have no idea how many sketch books we have had during our time together... I wouldn’t only draw your face, sometimes scenery that we saw during our travels,“ Joe chuckled, pushing his hair backwards as he thought of the fond memories.

“I see that, though I suppose that theses are _me_ as well?” Nicky asked, holding up the sketch book and showing one of them for the north African man. Joe chuckled again, his cheeks got covered in a light pink shade, spreading all the way up to his ears.

“Yeah, that’s you. I’m surprised you found _that_ sketch _,_ ” the brown eyed man scratched the back of his neck. “I should go and get the broom,” he cleared his throat before quickly turning on his heel.

“Yus-“ Nicolo hesitated, but he tried to take back what ever he was gonna say when the dark haired man looked back. Their eyes meeting, the connection between them felt like sparks of electricity spreading across their bodies.

*

The fair haired man woke with a panting breath, feeling the pulse of his heart beat hard inside of his chest. The vivid dream—no, the memories of seeing a beautiful smile form on Joe’s lips. Nicky hadn’t seen anything like that before, it was as if he saw the bright sun light up the whole morning sky, _if_ it could smile. Nicolo hadn’t seen Joe smile like that at all during these weeks, the only thing that was close to it, was when the dark haired man had chuckled about the sketchbooks, but _that smile_ was filled pain. And this wasn’t. It was filled with so much happiness, love and everything that could not be contained under the heavens.

The sensation of _his_ soft lips, pressed against Nicky’s own. A smile forming on both of their faces as they felt the love, the warmth of each other. Nicolo looked around in the dark bedroom, his fingers trembling against his bottom lip. Tracing where he had felt Yusuf’s lips, where they had touched. A trembling breath escaped his own, fear struck in the core of his soul. Not fear over that he had kissed another man, fear—terror over not remembering person that _he_ had loved with his whole soul, for _more than_ _900 years_. A person that had felt more like a part of himself, then anything else. A person who apparently no words could simply describe what they had felt for each other.

*

Joe woke up with a gasping breath. His chest drenched in sweat, it felt as if he had taken his first breath of air after he had died. The dark haired man looked around himself, seeing the he was in the safe-house, the light inside of where Nicolo was sleeping was still lit. He pushed his hair backwards, away from his face. Trying to breath deeply, calming his heart beat down and not feel the rush of adrenaline rush inside of him, after the nightmare.

The car crash was still vivid in his mind, Joseph could feel the glass shatter across his skin, the feel of the wreckage slowly closing in on them. The metal bending, forming around their bodies. The look of terror from Nicky’s eyes. The feeling and the sight of seeing how his light green eyes slowly became two dark beads as the life inside of him ran out. The hope that they would wake up again, the dread of either of them wouldn’t wake up. The only terror of the earth, that was the struck deep into their bones.

The taste of water, making its way inside of their lungs, burning pain as both of the men tried to take that first vital breath of air when they woke up from death. The heaviness of drenched clothes, sticking to both metal and human bodies. The sight of blood filled waters, clouding the water and their gazes. The sense of falling deeper, into a place where there might be no return from. Their life grazing across the event horizon. Seeing the fading light, fade into oblivion.

The desperate search of each other before both of them drowned, again. The fear striking again, as they had do it all over. Until they both where up on the shore, to feel that sweet taste of air, and not the water drowning their lungs, not the burning pain they felt when their lungs tried their best to convert the H2O to O2.

Yusuf felt the scratchy fabric from the sofa against his fingers, bring him back to reality, to where he was. The north African man let out a deep sigh, before sitting up and hunching over. _“Could the car crash really have been the cause of_ _Nicky_ _’s memory loss?”_ Joe thought to himself. The brown eyed man had never felt the urge to drown his thoughts in alcohol, he had seen Booker do that enough times. But right now, Joe had never felt a stronger urge for a drink, he hoped that Andromache hadn’t drank all of it.

“Can’t sleep?” A dark whisper echoed across the kitchen table, sending a shiver across Joe’s skin. He turned around and saw Nicolo leaning against the door post, the fair haired man had his arms crossed over his chest. Nicky’s eyes where filled with a kindness that Joseph hadn’t seen in a long time, the urge—the crave for the drink increased.

“No,” the brown eyed man answered, turning his focus back to the glass in front of him. “Had a nightmare-a memory of the last time you where _you_ …” Joe breathed, the last words not more than a bare whisper before turning his gaze on Nicolo. The way the moonlight shined in the room, made it almost seem like he had tears in his eyes. It made the north African man almost drop his glass in the floor, but before they need to clean up the glass, Joe sat it down on the counter behind him and walked up with a quick pace towards the other man.

The dark haired man almost touched Nicolo’s cheek from habit, but he stopped himself and looked at green eyed man. Nicky nodded his head in a small, almost non existing action. But one Joe _knew_ , he knew that Nicky had given him consent to touch him. The dark haired man’s hand where trembling as he moved it closer to the fair haired man’s cheek, feeling the light scruff, and the warm sensation of his skin meeting his. Both of them let out a shaky breath, the waves of anxiety washing over them and letting them relax into this touch.

“I’m not who you think I am. I have _mostly_ no idea of these memories you speak of, these feelings of deep, emotional love. I’m not...” Nicolo’s voice broke up in the end, his eyes filled with tears. “I’m not whom I’m supposed to be,” he added, looking straight at the other man. Joe’s eyes where filled with tears too, but they didn’t break their comfort from his eyes. Only building up, until one single tear rolled down the brown eyed man’s cheek.

“Yes... I know that.” Joseph whispered, shifting his eyes as he couldn’t longer bare to feel those green eyes on him. The feeling of his loved one not being able to remember who they had been, what they had experienced _together_ as a couple during all those great years. To not be able to remember the first time they made each other laugh, cry or smile. Only able to remember the pain of each other swords puncturing into their soft flesh, the warm, thick, dark red blood trickling down and coating their hands and swords. Before the life ran out of them, then to have to do it all over again.

“Yus-I have seen these fragments of memories, of us… _Kissing_ ,” the green eyed man whispered, his eyes shifting to the dark haired man who had moved his hand from Nicky’s cheek down to his forearm. Drawing light circles with his index finger. “Have we… Ever?” Nicky added with a stuttering breath, Joseph quickly looked up at him. Joe knew instantly what this was about, and he could see on the flush color across Nicolo’s cheeks of what he didn’t really dare to ask him.

“No-well we tried once many centuries ago,” the brown eyed man answered truthfully, making the Italian man nod. “It’s not something for us.” Joe added, his face almost completely expressionless. His finger had stopped moving, but it was still placed comfortably on top of Nicky’s arm.

“But-” Nicky looked even more confused, than he had when the dark haired man had told him that they are—have been in love. The green eyed man’s face showed a look of he trying really hard to wrap his mind around this. Joe couldn’t help to chuckle a little. After all Nicky looked pretty cute, when he was all confused like this and didn’t have a death glare pointed at Joseph.

“Nicolo, you are- _were_ asexual.” Joe stated, a small, confident, smile forming on his lips. “You did not have sexual attraction and you didn’t desire sex.” He explained, proud over who Nicolo was, but the brown eyed man couldn’t help himself to pull away from Nicky. Shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans instead, and taking a step backwards. Joe’s body regaining its glisten in the moonlight, showering across his body from the window.

“Oh, I’m sorry I didn’t know,” Nicky noted, moving closer to Joe _as if_ the fair haired man was trying to regain the lost space between them.

“No worries, there is _noway that you couldn’t know_.” The north African man smiled, and once again it where that somber one. The one that ached inside of Nicolo, the heart wrenching pain filling him slowly. The one that made him want to embrace Joseph in a warm hug and not care about how he had _wanted_ to kill him weeks ago. “You should get some sleep,” Joe mumbled before walking back to the counter and looking at the glass filled with alcohol.

“Will you be able too?” Nicolo questioned, making the dark haired man turn his gaze back up. He didn’t answer, only giving the same somber smile, again. Nicky tightened his fist behind his back, the Italian man could feel how his body moved on his own towards the brown eyed man. Nicolo felt inside of him that he would cross the worlds ends, only to make that melancholy smile vanish from his, _beautiful_ , face.

Nicolo placed his hands on either side of Joe’s face and pulled him close, pushing his lips aggressively against the dark haired man’s. The glass breaking in the sink, as they melted into one. Their breathing became strained, the air heavy with passion, desire of each other. But Joesph’s shoulder where trembling, his whole body was shaking. The fair haired man pulled their lips apart, he saw how the dark haired man was crying. The tears shining in the moonlight, like small stars cradling his face. The green eyed man felt the panic rise inside of him. What had he done? Had he kissed him wrong or was there something else going on?

“Yus-” Nicky’s voice trembled once more.

“I love you beyond measure and reason. You are the moon in my life, this guiding light that keeps me warm during the cold, dark, nights so I don’t have to shiver from the lack of your love. The warmth and kindness that fills your heart, is more than what world- _what I deserves_.” Joe cried, “But I can’t kiss you, not now, when you don’t love me.” He added, pulling away from Nicky’s embrace, leaving the fair haired man standing there all alone in the kitchen.

The cold air spreading inside of Joseph’s lungs as he rushed outside on the balcony. The tear covered cheeks chilling by the low temperatures. The dark haired man saw the snow covered mountains, the blankets of snow. The quietness of the night filling him with peace.

*

The fair haired man felt the warmth from Joe’s body slowly leaving him. His eyes completely empty, only two dark beads placed in his face. There was no more life inside of those deep brown eyes of his. Nicolo’s hand trembled as he placed it lightly on the north African man’s cheek, leaning forward and resting his forehead against the his. Nicky’s whole body tenses, and the surge of memories flood back to him. He sees Yusuf smiling, it where like a sliver of sun light, peaking through and light up his entire world. Them sleeping together, arms wrapped around his slender waist as the dark haired man tried to keep him safe from the dark and cold night. The centuries of them together, _in love_. Nicolo sees the bond he had never thought he would share with anyone, a _bond_ that he didn’t really think was possible, _to share_. They where _soulmates_.

Nicky felt how all of his emotions boil inside of him. The anger, _the regret_ of what he had said to _the love of his life_ during these weeks, _months_.

“I remember… _Yusuf, I remember_.” He mumbles in Italian. The fair haired man felt a fear inside of him, _what if_ he wasn’t going to see that smile, to see Joe’s beautiful eyes or to even say that he is sorry for all that he said. Nicolo knows that he had caused Joe a pain that he would never want to cause him.

“ _Yusuf_ … I am so sorry,” Nicky sobs into his skin, lifting his gaze up and seeing that the dark haired man’s eyes is still lifeless—empty. The green eyed man’s hands tremble down to the many bullet wounds covering Joe’s body, the blood still seeping out, the wounds not healing. A shaky breath escaped Nicky’s lips, the fear really struck deep inside of his bones. The fair haired man closed his eyes tight to let the burning of the tears disappear.

A gasp of air, his eyes looking around, trying to assert the situation. Joseph saw Nicky sitting bent over him, the green eyed man’s hands trembling over his no longer existing wounds. His shoulder trembling and tears covering his cheeks, but his eyes closed tight as if Nicky tried to hide himself from the pain of seeing the brown eyed man’s dead—lifeless body.

“ _I’m here…_ ” Joe whispers in Italian, moving his hands up towards Nicolo’s cheek. The fair haired man open his eyes quickly and the light green meet the deep brown eyes. Like the forrest becoming one, _again_. Yusuf saw how tears form once again in Nicky’s eyes, spilling over and covering his cheek’s, like speckles of moonlight. The dark haired man grunted in pain as he pulled the other man into an embrace, wrapping his arms tight around him and holding Nicolo close. Letting the fair haired man hear and feel his heart beat.

“I am so sorry, I have no words for how I acted towards you… _You are the love of my life, you are my everything, all and more_.” He cries into Joe’s shoulder, the tears staining his clothes.

“ _Nicolo…_ ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Goblin mood just made me wanna do this because of funnsies.
> 
> I literally cried when going over Nicky’s version of this and I have no idea how this make more painful and emotional then the original.
> 
> I hoped you'll enjoyed it.

**Author's Note:**

> I have easter eggs as usually in my writing, anyone find them?
> 
> And evil bond author is back! Hope ya'll enjoyed it and have some more of Ace!Nicky.


End file.
